"Catholic schools give you a better education!" I was literally told dinosaurs were made up by scientists to lure me away from god
i love that nicki’s outright rejected drake a bunch of times in real life too though and i bet a third party contacted him like “nicki minaj wants you to—-” and he was on a plane
'Tell me what happens the first time you see a woman naked.'
'The first time you see a woman naked will not be like you imagined. There will be no love, no trust, no intimacy. You won’t even be in the same room as her.
You won’t get to smile as she undresses you and you undress her. You won’t get to calm her nerves with nerves of your own. You won’t get to kiss her, feeling her lips and the edge of her tongue. You won’t get to brush your fingers over the lace of her bra or count her ribs or feel her heartbeat.
The first time you see a woman naked you will be sitting in front of a computer screen watching someone play at intimacy and perform at sex. She will contort her body to please everyone in the room but her. You will watch this woman who is not a woman, pixelated and filtered and customized. She will come ready-made, like an order at a restaurant. The man on the screen will be bigger than you, rougher than you. He will teach you how to talk to her. He will teach you where to put your hands and he will teach you what you’re supposed to like. He will teach you to take what is yours.
You must unlearn this. You must unlearn this twisted sense of love. You must unlearn the definition of pleasure and intimacy you are being taught. Kill this idea of love, this idea of entitlement, this way of scarring one another.’”
What if you got the power to talk to animals but it turned out that animals are all aggressively Christian and keep trying to get you to come to youth group
Once Johnlock is canon I hope the new running gag will be Mrs Hudson always interrupting them before/during/after (strongly implied) sex